Friday, December 6, 2013


So, as you know, i just turned 41 on 12-03-2013. I am a mother of 5 and i have never been married. Why? I never really felt the need or want to be someones wife. It may sound bad to most but as I dive deeper into my family history, it doesn't seem that uncommon. The one ancestor that has my attention the most right now is my 3x grand father James. I haven't learned much about him yet but i tell you he is in my ear big time. My family is one that has been blessed with a long life line, so the elders remember a lot on all sides of the family. Growing up, i thought it was common to know, not only your grand parents, but also your great grand parents. My great grand ma Arbee Cornelia Wallace  helped my grand mother Naomi raise me until she passed when i was 19. It wasn't until i was much older that i realized that that wasn't the norm. Some kids never knew their grand parents or they passed when they were very small.  Any who, back to the subject at hand. 41, never married, yada, yada, yada lol. As i venture back with each generation, i notice one thing they all have in common: short marriages. Is being bad at relationships or not even sticking around long enough to build something lasting genetically encoded in us? Who knows.

So in my search, i find James Wallace. Then i find James and Mary, then James and Mattie and then i find James and Gracie. What the what? So i'm thinking this can not be the correct information and this must be a common name in TN. NOT! Talking to my granny while researching, she confirmed that he is one in the same and yes he Married maybe 3 times (2 for sure) and had kids with each union. thanks a lot grand pa lol. Well, my granny as well as my great granny kept the obits of relatives that have passed which has helped so much in my search. I haven't been able to find out anything yet that has given me any indication as to what kind of man he was but i feel a strong need to know. Of his 3 ,um............situations, i am descended from the 1st one. He and mary had 3 sons: Tom, Robert and Lee Wallace. Tom had Cornelia, she had naomi, she had vera and TADA, me. Tom married twice to  Francise Craig and Tennie Mitchell. Francise is my 2x great grand ma. Francise had a sister, Gracie. Notice anything??? Ding ding ding, you got it, James married his sons sister in law. I wonder if Gracies kids with james called tom uncle/brother tom. This is just where my mind goes with this one, sorry.

Bottom line, no one ever stayed with anyone for a long period of time. I cant help but to wonder why. what was the dominant factor that pulled them a part? Hard times, different social circles or was papa just a rolling stone? What ever the case may be, I aim to find out.

I know i tend to babble and be all over the place but trust me, theres a method to my madness. Until next time.


  1. Say there ... enjoyed reading your post. LOVE that background was it one of your photo's or did you get from someone? The old telephone and the TV really bring back some memories. Can't wait to find out what else is happening with James.

  2. thanks, it was one of the backgrounds offered when i started the blog.

  3. Great post. I have also been thinking about intergenerational patterns in relationships.

  4. Your madness is good, keep it coming. Never married is normal for one branch, bad marriages for another, multiple marriages/several divorces for another. I don't think my family knows how to do a good marriage.